“I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn’t say it clearly in the moment.”
It’s something I hear all the time when I’m working with clients, and when we unpack it, that’s usually the real issue.
Most of the time, people do know what they want to say. They understand their role, their work and the conversation they’re part of. The challenge is saying it clearly, in the moment, without overthinking or second-guessing.
You see it in meetings, in networking conversations and especially when someone is put on the spot. Someone asks a simple question:
“So, what do you do?” “Who do you usually work with?” “What’s the benefit of that?”
Suddenly, something straightforward feels surprisingly difficult. You start editing as you speak, worrying about how it sounds and trying to get it “right”. That’s when it starts to unravel.
This is where people often assume it’s a confidence issue, but more often, it’s a clarity and structure issue. When you don’t have a clear way to organise your thoughts, your brain tries to do everything at once:
- Work out what to say
- Work out how to say it
- Manage how it will be received
All in real time. That’s a lot of pressure for a simple answer.
This is why I use structures in both my Presentation Masterclass and UpSpeaking sessions. The aim is not to make people sound scripted or rehearsed, but to give them something to rely on when they’re under pressure. When you have a structure, you don’t have to start from scratch every time you speak. You already have a clear way forward.
Take a question like: “What do you do?” Without structure, answers often become:
- Too long
- Too vague
- Unclear
With a simple structure, it becomes much easier. For example:
- What you do
- Who you help
- The benefit
Instead of overthinking, you might say: “I run a training company that helps professionals feel more confident speaking in meetings, so they can contribute more clearly and effectively.”
It’s simple. It’s clear. It answers the question.
The same applies in meetings. When you’re contributing, the aim is not to say something impressive, but to say something useful in a way that is easy for others to follow.
That might look like:
- Asking a question — “What impact is that going to make?”
- Building on an idea — “Can I just add to that…”
- Clarifying the discussion — “Just to check, are we saying that…?”
These aren’t complicated contributions, but they are effective. They help move the conversation forward.
What I often remind people is this:
The goal isn’t to say something perfectly. It’s to say something clearly.
When you focus on clarity over perfection, everything becomes easier. You stop trying to impress and start trying to communicate. Confidence then starts to build, not from having all the right words in advance, but from knowing you can respond in the moment without getting stuck. You have something to rely on.
If you ever find yourself thinking, “I don’t know what to say,” try reframing it.
You probably do know. You just need a simpler way to say it.
Focus on clarity. Use a structure.
Next time you’re asked a question about what you do, try using a simple structure in your head before you answer.
Comments
3
LikeCommentShare
Add a comment…
Open Emoji Keyboard
No comments, yet.
Be the first to comment.Start the conversation